Opinion

Once upon a time someone dreamt up these nightmares

by
August 21, 2017

Cartoon courtesy of Jess Rae of Doodley Squat.

I SOMEHOW managed to get through another year of Book Week relatively unscathed.
Apart from a little mishap with the superglue and Maya changing her mind every damn minute about who she wanted to be, my sanity remained intact. Just.
I was quite happy with Ayla’s choice of character this year because it seemed fairly uncomplicated.
She chose Dr Dog from Babette Cole’s book of the same name.
The story is basically about a dog who has to treat the filthy members of the Gumboyle family who either have worms because they ‘‘scratch their bum and put their fingers in their mouth’’ (her words not mine), nits because they shared hair brushes, or have a nasty cough because they have been ‘‘secretly smoking in the bicycle shed’’.
Oh, and of course Pa Gumboyle who ‘‘farts so hard he blows the roof off the house’’ because he eats too many baked beans and drinks too much beer.
Yes, this is an actual children’s book.
So back to the costume, all we needed was a doctor’s coat, a white cap and long dog ears.
Unfortunately the dog ears proved to be a little trickier than I expected.
I superglued Ayla’s hair to the headband as I was trying to attach the dog ears to it.
And if that wasn’t frustrating enough, I glued my fingers to the said headband and piece of hair.
After a bit of chopping and dousing fingers in nail polish remover, I managed to save the headband and ears from total destruction.
Ayla wasn’t too impressed though.
Neither were my fingers.
Then came the indecisiveness of my youngest, Maya.
She started off as the cat from Cat in the Hat, but of course that wasn’t girly enough.
But then Moana became Sleeping Beauty which then became Moana again and then Barbie was thrown in the mix to which I replied ‘‘you can go as Pa Gumboyle if you don’t make up your mind right now!’’.
So Sleeping Beauty it was.
Which I didn’t get much of the night before because I was too busy getting their costumes ready.
Next year eBay.

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